I never could before
“Doctor, doctor, will I be able to play the violin after the operation?”
“Yes, of course…”
“Great! I never could before!” [Read more...]
Jokes – I never could before, Sunshine, Learn math and Do you hear me
March 25, 2012 By
Jokes – Guy goes hunting, Joke on life cycle, Fisherman and Help me
March 24, 2012 By
Guy goes hunting
A guy goes hunting and wants to hire a dog to retrieve the catch.
“I have just the dog for you, sir.” says the gamekeeper. “He’s called Salesman and he is brilliant” Off they go and every time the hunter shoots a bird the dog runs off and brings the bird back just as he was hired to do; a great success.
The following year, the same guy goes back and asks for Salesman as he was so good last year.
“Ah, I’m sorry, sir, but it won’t work anymore. Someone had the bright idea of calling him Sales Manager – now he just sits on his arse and barks all day”. [Read more...]
Jokes – Hot or cold, Lips are moving, Animal crackers and Ego and IQ
March 23, 2012 By
Hot or cold
Q: Which runs faster, hot or cold?
Ans: Hot. Everyone can catch cold. [Read more...]
Jokes – Supermodel and Pizza, Return his samples, That’s the quickest way and How far do you want to see
March 22, 2012 By
Supermodel and Pizza
A supermodel orders a pizza and the waiter asks if he should cut it into six or twelve pieces. She says, “Six, please. I could never eat twelve pieces.” [Read more...]
Jokes – First day of school, Say to the other, Best ever and Every night
March 21, 2012 By
First day of school
On the first day of school, the Kindergarten teacher said, “If anyone has to go to the bathroom, hold up two fingers.”
A little voice from the back of the room asked, “How will that help?” [Read more...]
Jokes – Relationship, Pay the bill, Lion on Tim’s wife and Mathematician at home
March 20, 2012 By
Relationship
Relationships are hard. It’s like a full time job, and we should treat it like one. If your boyfriend or girlfriend wants to leave you, they should give you two weeks’ notice. There should be severance pay.
And the day before they leave you, they should have to find you a temp. [Read more...]
Jokes – Brain scan, Bunk Classes, I’m better than you and The World’s Strongest
March 19, 2012 By
Brain scan
A man goes to the hospital for its brain scan.
According to the results:
In his left brain no one’s right
And in his right brain nothing’s left [Read more...]
Jokes – Mathematicians joke, I was joking, Lucky number and Remember me
March 18, 2012 By
Mathematicians joke
What is the shortest mathematicians joke?
Let epsilon be smaller than zero. [Read more...]
Jokes – I always thought, Demonstrating, Weekend, and Teacher and Student
March 17, 2012 By
I always thought
Having completed a course of analysis with his psychiatrist, John tells a friend:
“I always thought I was indecisive”
Friend: “And now?”
John: “I’m not so sure.” [Read more...]